Day: January 18, 2018

The Gospel According to Republican Jesus

Humor, Politics, The Resistance

One of the more interesting characters to emerge in 2017 is Republican Jesus.

Here are a few of my favorite verses from the fake bible of America’s fake Christians.  I found these on Twitter and Google search.

I do not own them.

Republican Jesus meme that reads, 'For you were a stranger so I vilified you."
You were a stranger so I vilified you.

 

A Republican Jesus Meme that reads, "Love Thy Neighbor as long as he's the same race and religion and not a homo."
Love Thy Neighbor as long as he’s the same race and religion and not a homo.

 

Republican Jesus meme that reads, "Crush your enemies, see them driven out before you, hear the lamentation's of their women. "
Crush your enemies, see them driven out before you, hear the lamentation’s of their women.

 

Republican Jesus meme that reads, "Only feed the ones who pass the drug test"
Only feed the ones who pass the drug test

 

Meme of Republican Jesus asking for proof of insurance before healing a child.
Before I heal you I need proof of insurance.

 

Meme of Republican Jesus who says, "and Christian's will ignore the sick and poor and build bigger churches to prove their Christianity."
and Christian’s will ignore the sick and poor and build bigger churches to prove their Christianity.

 

Republican Jesus says to the leper, "And Jesus said to the Leper, "I'm sorry, you have a preexisting condition."
And Jesus said to the Leper, “I’m sorry, you have a preexisting condition.”

 

Republican Jesus suffers the little children to come unto him that he may teach them the proper way to hold a gun.
Republican Jesus suffers the little children to come unto him that he may teach them the proper way to hold a gun.

 

Meme of republican jesus saying, "I know he raped you, Sally, but what's really important is the senate seat."
I know he raped you, Sally, but what’s really important is the senate seat.
Republican Jesus meme that reads, "Why should I heal the sick'
Why should I heal the sick?
Republican Jesus I'm going to need to see your papers
Of course I love you but I need to see your documents, except for the little blond one.
epublican Jesus -- Typical Liberal meme
Republican Jesus demands the stoning of Magdalene.

Updated February 15, 2018

Rob Goldstein