A surrealist digital painting of poet, Rob Goldstein, based on a photograph by Nina Glaser

Mental Health: The Struggle to be a good person

People have described me as flaky, high maintenance, difficult, hysterical, confusing, compulsive, and dishonest.

That last one, dishonest, is a common reaction to people with DID.

People tend to go with what makes the most sense based on what they know.

Most people know nothing about the mind, much less states of mind.

The other words on that list are alternate descriptions of the symptoms of DID.

Gaps in memory look flaky, but they’re more than forgetting. These gaps
are the same as not knowing.

High maintenance means I require more medical supports and more patience from friends and family.

Panic attacks look like hysteria.

Personality switches are confusing because my alternates have different interests.

However, the words people use aren’t all negative.

People also describe me as loving, intelligent, empathetic, compassionate, loyal, strong, and honest.

That last, honest, means I say what I think is true based on what I know or think I know.

The goals of treatment for dissociative identity disorder

My ultimate goal in life is to be a good person; it’s an ongoing project and a choice I have to make every day.

What are the words people use to describe you?

(c) Rob Goldstein 2019

58 thoughts on “Mental Health: The Struggle to be a good person

  1. Love that meme on being believed. True story.
    Also, I wish more people had the goal of being a good person. For the record, you’re already on my list of good people.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. You are the bravest blogger I know, Rob. It isn’t easy exposing the struggles but you do it in a way that can help others. What do people say about me? Mostly they say I am a kind good person. I will embrace that.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. You do me a huge honor with your comment, Jan. I can only do this because I have followers who are willing to accept me and embrace my concerns. I agree with what most people say about you, Jan. Thank you again for your comment.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I’m in certain the one who must thank dear Rob. Your works are all highly recommended and this one especially hit me in my heart because, I have also the same feeling and experiences πŸ™πŸ™πŸ‘

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Dan, I moved by your comment. If I said I always felt strong in myself, I’d be a liar. I spend most of my time riddled with doubt about almost everything. But I never doubt the value of using my experience to inform and help other people. I believe in the power of the wounded healer, which is at the heart of my faith as a Christian.

      Liked by 2 people

  3. Look at this wonderful discussion. Rob, all those good things are true of you — of all of you.
    If I honestly felt, in the depths of my heart, that people said good things about me, perhaps I wouldn’t be so, agoraphobic and whatever else I am.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hi Teagan. Accepting that all people have assets and liabilities are the only way to accept the self. Understanding which of my liabilities are functions of the illness is helpful because it can help me improve. Moving on from that, you have some of the most loyal followers on WordPress. Your readers love you. And I have nothing but good things to say about you. Our collaborations introduced me to a community of writers I have grown to admire and respect, writers from whom I can learn.

      I think you’re the bee’s pajamas. 

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Ugh! I’m sorry to hear that. My allergy to eggs acts a lot like food poisoning… I hope you haven’t become allergic to anything. Whatever the cause, take good care of you. Rest and liquids. πŸ™‚ And hugs!

        Liked by 1 person

  4. “People also describe me as, loving, intelligent, empathetic, compassionate, loyal, strong, and honest.” Robert, that is what stands out the most for YOU when I read your blog posts, and know you are a giving supporter of your blog friends. I think I’m described about the same. I’ve lived a long time (80 years) and focus more on others! Have a happy week. πŸ“š Christine

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Hi Rob,
    I don’t begin to understand DID not alone have to live with it. But since I have followed you, I have learned much and witnessed compassion toward everyone (except – we know who). Thank you for continuing your campaign of educating us on your world. HUGS

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you Chuck. It is a campaign. When I write about my experience of DID I’m writing for the kid who right now lives in fear for his life and is on the brink of wiring his brain for a lifetime of confusion and pain. I’m keenly aware of this as a moment when all adults who can do so, must stand up and speak out for the kids abused by the U.S. president’s draconian racial policies. The greatest achievement in the world is giving a kid a chance to thrive. This is my way of working to do that.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. The mind isn’t understood yet, its vast like the ocean. Perhaps people are only negative because they don’t understand. I finf the more positive descriptions more accurate.

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Absolutely, Denise. I think people confuse ‘focusing on the negative with ‘accepting the negative, but acceptance is crucial to successfully coping with a chronic condition. Thanks for leaving a comment.


  7. Thank you for educating us about DID, Robert. It is more easy to understand, when we get more knowledge. Just like with anything else.

    I haven’t noticed all, what people are saying about me, but I try to be a good person, open-minded and empathic. Like you said, it is a choice every day.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. I am true to my word…I am honest to a fault…I have impossibly high standards…I have an unreasonable sense of injustice…my morality is Puritan…I am unwavering and steadfast in my beliefs…and…I’m a bitch.
    You…are beautiful.

    Liked by 3 people

  9. I think the more you describe yourself and your condition the more we can understand DID. This is a brave undertaking and I have to thank you for teaching us about DID. Bless you, Rob.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Dear, dear Rob,

    I would describe you are a warm, compassionate, extremely talented, creative soul who makes the experience of blogging so much more worthwhile with his presence.
    I’m blessed to know you and please don’t take any of these stereotypes personally.

    People describe me as kind, radiant, optimistic and genuine. Ahem! πŸ™‚
    Have a great week ahead.

    Liked by 1 person

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