There are Worse Delusions Than Mine Out There

There are worse delusions than me out there.

A digital painting based on an avatar in virtual reality of a young man flying a hover-board
There are Worse Delusions than me out there

I don’t incite armed racists to kill innocent people to distract the press from crimes I would never commit.

A digital painting based on an avatar in virtual reality flying a hover-board
I don’t incite armed racists to kill people to distract from crimes I would never commit

I don’t think blowing up the world is better than letting people who are different from me live their lives.

A digital painting based on an avatar in virtual reality flying a hover-board
I don’t think blowing up the world is better than letting people who are different from me live their lives.

At my worst I wouldn’t vote to starve children.

A digital painting based on an avatar in virtual reality flying a hover-board
At my worst I wouldn’t vote to starve children.

Plus, I’m fun

A digital painting based on an avatar in virtual reality flying a hover-board
Plus I’m Fun



I hope you enjoy this fun little cover of ‘Blackbird’ as much as I do.

It’s remixed with Garageband and text-to-speech vocals

It cracks me up.

 

Beatles – Blackbird (Trance mix)
Uploaded to the Internet Archives
by Rina Kim

on 11/18/2008

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A Letter from Home: When My Alternates Talk to Each Other

For those who don’t know my blog, I have DID and a small family
of alternates.

One of my alternates is a 16 year old boy and the other is a
woman named Sara.

They know each other; Sara is a protector and Mother figure.

I found this letter from Bobby to Sara composed in 2010  with her reply.

I am surprised by the correspondence because I didn’t know
my alternates were friends and allies.

The logic of Dissociative Identity Disorder is that ‘split’ aspects
of the self are perceived as “other”.

I think that Sara was the first alternate, which means she
emerged in childhood.

She comes out when one of the younger alters feels threatened.

 

There are many letters filed under ‘Letters from Home”.

Most of these are from Bobby to Bob.

Bobby wrote this to Sara as a 15-year-old.

It is the only letter from Bobby to Sara.

Her reply follows this post.

dear sara,

i’m at battery park in Charleston watching an old guy with a
big box of crackers.

he’s feeding it to a flock of pigeons.

it reminds me of the story of exodus.

you reckon god threw manna at us a watched
us fight?

sometimes i think life is magic but grown ups don’t
wanna talk about magic.

ok, so, i got a question:

let’s say one day u meet someone an this person sez they got alotta  love for you an wanna do good by you but somethin’ dont feel right but you need to be loved an the dude seems straight up but there’s a shadow that you don’t really see but you know it’s there and it feels familiar.

but you don’t want to lose the love so u try to make room for  the shadow by telling yourself it ain’t there, when bam!

you catch the dude in a lie, like when we was robby, with nasty secrets, an the cruel bruises and words that slice your soul.

so you try to talk about it cuz you wanna believe it’s all in your head  so you say to the dude that says he loves you, you say: “i’m scared  that somethin’ is wrong.”

right away he starts calling me names an saying i’m a hater an that i ain’t got no gratitude cuz most folks don’t even want to know me an i think, “damn! this feels familiar!”

the only person that will ever love me will leave if i try to talk about these shadows that are now everywhere so i get confused, cuz I really  want it to be me, cuz maybe i’m imagining it, cuz maybe i’m a hater an  everything about me is wrong.

sara, are those shadows really there?

and i got one last question about thinking life is magic.

how come when i say i think the world is made of magic folks tell me to get over it and grow up?

Love,

Bobby

A Letter from Home: Dear Bobby

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My Femininity

A woman
of no
fixed
gender,
abjectly
free
of
memory
yet
pregnant
with
forgotten
wounds.

image and text (c) Rob Goldstein 2017

5 Day Music Challenge, Day 2: Blowing up Fish

Thanks to Danica from Living the Beautiful Life for nominating
me for the Five-Day Music challenge.

The rules are:

Post a song a day for five consecutive days.

Post what the lyrics mean to you.  (Optional)

Post the name of the song and video

Nominate two (or one) different blogger each day of the challenge

For the challenge, I decided to focus on how I first became aware of music and to describe over the next five days how my taste in music broadened and changed.

I met my best friend James one August day in 1969 at Colonial Lake.

It was a hot and muggy and all the fish in the lake died.

James was lighting up Cherry Bombs and tossing them into the lake.

When I asked why, he said he was ‘blowin’ up’ the fish’.

I laughed and asked where he got his black eye.

He said he got in a fight that morning at school and decide to cut out.

I told him I almost got shot the night before ‘cause I really did.

“You almost got shot!” I could see I had his respect. “What did you do?”

“Scream.” I answered. Then we laughed an’ blew up some more fish and
became best friends.

James and I ran with Charleston’s hippies.

Here are some of the songs we played:

The Who – I Can See For Miles

Tomorrow Never Knows – The Beatles

Cream – Strange Brew

 

The Mamas & the Papas  – Look Through My Window

 

Donovan – Sunshine Superman

 

Hair – Walking In Space

 


My Nominees are:

Joyfully Stated

jacquelineobyikocha

Bird Flight