Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives – Mixed Nuts Part 2 by Linda Bethea

from the Smorgasbord Blog Magazine

Smorgasbord Blog Magazine

I am so pleased that Linda Bethea is going to share some of her heartwarming and entertaining posts from her archives over the coming weeks. Linda’s family stories always has me in fits of laughter or shedding a tear. I hope you will also head over and buy the books that Linda has published. Here is the link to part one of her mini-series: Mixed Nuts part 1

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Mixed Nuts Part 2 by Linda Bethea

When you are dealing with family, it clarifies things to have a scale. You don’t have to waste time analyzing people when you have a ready reference. This one works pretty well for us.

1.Has a monogrammed straight jacket and standing reservation on mental ward.

2.Family is likely to move away without leaving forwarding address. Has jail time in the past or the future

3.People say, “Oh, crap. Here comes Johnny.”

4.Can go either way…

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#ExcerptWeek – Linda Bethea @Nutsrok1

Excerpt from Everything Smells Just Like Poke Salad by Linda Bethea

The Write Stuff

book-cover

We are wrapping up our extended #ExcerptWeek with a contribution from  popular blogger Linda Bethea, which I know you’re going to enjoy! Thanks for taking part, Linda. The floor is yours!

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Everything Smells Just Like Poke Salad

Excerpt from Chapter Twelve
Special Times

Most farm business was conducted in Cuthand, but Daddy would sometimes catch a ride with the mailman or hire a ride to go to Clarksville by himself to take care of things. However, on a few, glorious occasions I would awaken before daybreak to find Mama putting breakfast on the table and hurriedly packing food in the blue-banded, enamel water bucket. This could only mean one thing. We were all going to Clarksville! It didn’t matter what went in the bucket. The occasion made everything special.

A family trip to Clarksville was rare and logistics had to line up just so. The weather had to be right, conditions perfect…

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Something for Nothing!!!!

Linda’s new book is free through Sunday. Drop by Amazon and download a copy!

Nutsrok

Click on this image on the right for a link to get this ebook free from Kindle Saturday or Sunday only.  Please share!Book for orderI grew up in a family of competitive storytellers.  A little thing like a stubbed toe gets us started.  “Do you remember the time Grandpa cut his ingrown toenails out then fooled around and set his toe on fire?”  That is not a hypothetical example.  It’s beloved and oft-repeated tale. 

At family dinners, wild tales start as soon as we’ve said Grace and the food is being passed around.  “Remember that fifty-two pound turkey Daddy brought home to fatten for Thanksgiving on year!”

Someone else breaks in, “That old turkey was the meanest thing that ever walked!  We couldn’t even walk out in the yard without him flying over the fence and flogging us.  Mother was looking forward to him teaching those terrible Downs kids a lesson…

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