Quicksand or Time

kneel into

self

as thick as

quicksand

or time

as short as

life

the mind goes

fritz!

and still soft

words

are the fashion

is the suck-off

are the

dreams

of

more me

of me

on the street

stretching

absorbed

into

niches

where the

envious

self

fails, extending

contempt

to the

“worthless”

to the

owner

of a sleeping

bag whose

mind has

snapped —

onto mine.

 

(c) Rob Goldstein 2014-2017

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…of wisteria and the scent of honeysuckle

Her  death leaves
us with

hidden memories

of captured fireflies,

of wisteria and

the scent of

honeysuckle,

of taffy pulls
and
pink flamingos,

of Christmas and

the Wizard of Oz,

of swallowed

shame

and conflicting

secrets.

Image and text Rob Goldstein (c) 2017

The Alternate Universe of DID

sonniq over at My Name is Jamie. My Life in Prison asked me if my alternates communicate with each other.

In response I posted a Letter from Bobby to Sara and her reply.

There is a discrepancy between what I feel is true and what I know is true.

What I feel is that my body is populated by other people; people who are alike yet different; with different needs, points of view, ideas, and biases: with different needs, points of view, ideas, and biases.

As I check the Second Life photographs made by my alternates over the years I see no virtual representation for Rob Goldstein or Robert.

Bobby uses the name Rob Goldstein in Second Life by agreement with our therapist, but he does not accept the name as his.

Also by agreement with our therapist we use the same name regardless of which one is out, except Sara, who will only let Rob Goldstein sign her pictures with his initials.

The alternate who uses the name Robert Goldstein is the one who thinks
he’s old.

He is cranky and opinionated and dislikes Second life, which he describes
as a libertarian cesspool.

Bobby and Sara like Second Life and defend it as a creative outlet for people
who are disabled.

I’ve mentioned in other posts that Second Life is an extension of my
inner life
.

Some of my alternates are friends with each other.

Almost all of them like to dance, and when they use dance animations in Second Life they re-create real dancing by choosing animations based on
the beat of the song.

My alternates dance with each other as a form of soothing, especially as each comes to terms with the abuse and pain that brought them to life.

So, the answer is yes, they talk to each other and they collaborate on the illustrations that we use for the poems and stories we write.

On those occasions when the child alternates are frightened, Matthew brings  them into Second Life to comfort them.

The pictures below show different skill levels in composition and photo-processing. 

We knew nothing about photography, composition or Photoshop in 2009.

Over time our skills improved and we dispensed with reality based sets and backdrops since reality has no meaning for us, not in Second Life which
is little more than an extension of my inner world.

Mateo and Sara 2009
Mateo and Sara 2009
Bob and Bobby 2010
Bob and Bobby 2010
Mateo and Bobby- 2013
Mateo and Bobby- 2013
The Narrator and Sara -- 2013
The Narrator and Sara — 2013
Bobby and The Narrator - 2014
Bobby and The Narrator – 2014
Bobby and Sara - January 2014
Bobby and Sara – January 2014
Bobby and Matthew - 2013
Bobby and Matthew – 2013
Bobby and Sara - February 2014
Bobby and Sara – February 2014
Mateo and Sara - September 2014
Mateo and Sara – September 2014
Bobby and Sara - January 2014
Bobby and Sara – January 2014
Matthew and Sara - 2014
Matthew and Sara – 2014

 

Bobby and Sara - July 18, 2015
Bobby and Sara – July 18, 2015
Matthew and Peter - 2014
Matthew and Peter – 2014
Matthew and Robby - 2013
Matthew and Robby – 2013

 

 

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The Kiss

VR based digital painting of two mail avatars in the last few seconds before a kiss
The Kiss

soft

       hard

stroke smooth smoothly stroked back

rest chest on chest

                                  thigh on thigh

my hard on your soft

kiss…

(c) Bob Goldstein 1976

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