It’s Schadenfreude Eve, Boys and Girls

Tomorrow is a big day, Boys and Girls

Tomorrow Bob Mueller announces the first winners in the global Putin’s Puppets Awards.

The lucky winners get an autographed photo of Vladimir Putin in drag and lots of time in jail.

The contestants are:

NY Daily News Photograph of Paul Manafort
Paul ‘Dogface’ Manafort

Paul ‘Dogface’ Manafort

Manafort has laundered so much money he’s also known as ‘Mr. Maytag”.

NY Daily News Photo of Michael Flynn
Michael ‘Lock ‘er Up’ Flynn

Michael ‘Lock ‘er Up’ Flynn

Mike Flynn’s chants of ‘lock her up’ at anti-Clinton rallies while committing treasonous crimes against the people of the United States lowered the bar for treasonous hypocrites everywhere.

NY Daily News Photo of Carter Page
Carter ‘Twitchy Face’ Page

Carter ‘Twitchy Face’ Page

Twitchy Face is mentioned in the same dossier as the mythic pee-pee tapes.
His face twitches when he lies.

Image of Roger Stone
Roger ‘twitchy lips’ Stone

Roger ‘twitchy lips’ Stone

Also known as ‘that loud old drunk that spreads lies and right-wing conspiracy theories’.

Stone is also nicknamed ‘Twitchy Lips’ because his lips allegedly twitch when he kisses Trump’s ass.


A meme of Vladimir Putin claiming not to have heard of Jared Kushner: 'I never heard of her
Jared Kushner? Never heard of her

Jared ‘Squeaky’ Kushner

Kushner is allegedly Putin’s backdoor man.

 

Image of a pouting Donald Trump Jr.
Donald Trump Jr.

Donald Trump Jr.

aka ‘Love It!”

‘Love It!” allegedly met with Natasha Fatale to beg her to adopt him.

 

Cartoon showing Boris Badanov and Natasha Fatale leaving Trump Tower
Cartoon showing Boris Badanov and Natasha Fatale leaving Trump Tower

 

Donny ‘No Chins’ Trump

Profile photo of Donald Trump
Donny ‘No Chins” Trump

aka ‘They did it!

Allegedly conspired with Vladimir Putin to subvert the 2016
U.S. election.

He’s known to lie without reason and to have the uncanny
ability to get under his own skin.

Who will be the first to serve time?

My thanks to @RogueCPI for the title of this post.

On edit, 10/30/2017: Today’s winners of the Putin’s Puppets Awards are Paul ‘Dogface’ Manafort and Richard Gates. Read the indictment here: Indictment of Paul Manafort and Richard Gates.

On edit: This scenario reminds me of my favorite Kids in the Hall skit:

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Putin’s Hacker, Wikileaks Host Pyotr Chayanov, Hacked America’s Vote System And the DNC

from Louise Mensch

patribotics

On October 7th the DHS and the Intelligence Community released a statement on Russian hacking of the election.

They stated that:

The U.S. Intelligence Community (USIC) is confident that the Russian Government directed the recent compromises of e-mails from US persons and institutions, including from US political organizations. The recent disclosures of alleged hacked e-mails on sites like DCLeaks.com and WikiLeaks and by the Guccifer 2.0 online persona are consistent with the methods and motivations of Russian-directed efforts. These thefts and disclosures are intended to interfere with the US election process. Such activity is not new to Moscow—the Russians have used similar tactics and techniques across Europe and Eurasia, for example, to influence public opinion there. We believe, based on the scope and sensitivity of these efforts, that only Russia’s senior-most officials could have authorized these activities.

Let us translate: the USIC confirms that Guccifer 2 hacked the DNC…

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