What I did on my Summer Vacation

  1. I gave myself permission to post only when I wanted to.
  2. I spent time with my partner, loving our love for each
    other.
  3. I studied the Constitution and early 20th Century History.
  4. I gave myself a break from the emotionally laden material I
    wrote in the 1980’s and 90’s.
  5. I accepted that my writing is only for me and that when I die my
    work will die with me. Greatness is not required; an idea beautifully
    affirmed on Sue Vincent’s fine blog.
  6. I accepted the challenge of being present for my niece to the best of
    my ability.  I now understand in some small way, the worries of
    parenting adult children.
  7. I bought a powerful new laptop and so far, I’ve learned four new image-processing programs.
  8. I redesigned Art by Rob Goldstein.
  9. I re-thought and rewrote the ‘about me’ section of Art by Rob Goldstein
  10. I learned the terrible and exceedingly dull mysteries of SEO.
  11. I restructured and simplified the Menu options at the top of the page.
  12. I wrote a posting schedule:I will post on Monday’s, Wednesdays, and Saturdays and will use
    the rest of he week to make content and catch up with the blogs
    I follow.The schedule remains subject to whim.
  13. I realized how lucky I am to be alive and creative.
  14. My partner and I celebrated our Silver Anniversary last week.
    Photograph of two men in San Francisco City hall
    25 Years together, October 2017

    25 years and I couldn’t love him more.

Rob Goldstein 2017

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The Cycle of Abuse, Free Your Mind

Some days it feels as if my crazy ass Mother is in charge of the U.S. government.

Animated GIF of a scene from Joan Crawford's Straight Jacket in which her homicidal daughter hurls an ax at her
It’s like I woke up to find my crazy making family in charge of the government.

I found this old handout from my days as a treatment provider in San
Francisco’s mental health system.

It was written for survivors of domestic violence.

Few situations are more crazy making and chaotic than life with a
psychologically a
busive parent or spouse.

Here are 14 points to consider as you work to free your mind from the
narcissistic cycle of Abuse.

There is the difference between humility and
humiliation.

We reject and expose gaslighting.

 

A meme found online that describes the gaslighting stgrategy of denying what is true even when presented with physical evidence
Gas lighting, Red Flag

We call a lie a lie.

Healthy people do not tell other people what they want.

Anger is normal when trust is betrayed.

We have the right to say no.

We have the right to our own opinions.

We have the right to honest relationships.

We let abusive people suffer the consequences of their
actions
without guilt.

We expect friends and family members who hurt us
to know how to apologize.

No one will tell us what to think.

We do not take the blame for things we did not do.

When people violate our bodies and minds we hold
them accountable.

Accepting what we cannot change means changing
what we can.

The self-loathing projections of the abuser do not define us.

A friend who can’t feel shame and admit to being wrong is not
worth keeping.

 

 

Text and header image (c)  Rob Goldstein 2017 All Rights Reserved

 

 

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The Spirit of the Times

Animated Gif of President Trump shoving his way through a group of men
Corruption is arrogant.

1.

Corruption is arrogant.

It presumes we are weak.

It presumes our apathy.

Corruption insinuates itself into every day life.

If we do nothing corruption breaks our spirit and makes us slaves.

 

Animated gif of Trump saying Get him the Hell Out of here found on GIPHY
Get him the Hell Out of here

2.

When I speak of the spirit of the times, I speak of the collective vision
of the people.

In this picture, for instance, found at the internet archives:


Freedom of Worship

Norman Rockwell captured the vision of Franklin Roosevelt’s Four Freedoms.

As I understand the history of World War Two, the average person thought he or she was fighting to keep a way of life based on respect for independent thought, free speech,  tolerance for religious differences, basic economic security, and freedom from war.

In his January 1941 State of the Union Address President Franklin D. Roosevelt enumerated four essential freedoms for which we as a Nation stand and for which we will fight.

“The first is freedom of speech and expression—everywhere in the world.

The second is freedom of every person to worship God in his own way–everywhere in the world.

The third is freedom from want—which, translated into world terms, means economic understandings, which will secure to every nation a healthy peacetime life for its inhabitants—everywhere in the world.

The fourth is freedom from fear—which, translated into world terms, means a world-wide reduction of armaments to such a point and in such a thorough fashion that no nation will be in a position to commit an act of physical aggression against any neighbor—anywhere in the world.”

In 1941 the United States went to war with the evil called fascism.

The Allies rallied around human rights:

Copy of the announcement of the establishment of Social Security
Before government was demonized the people used it as a tool to improve their lives.

The Fascists focused on fear and global dominance.

Copy of a Nazi Soldiers fighting rat like Jews.
Fascist movements always demonize immigrants and minorities

Many of us would not have been born had the fascists won that war.

3.

What is faith?

In the cynical version of history Roosevelt lied about his four freedoms; cynics point to the racism, and the homophobia of that generation, and they are right.

The people who followed a president into a war to protect essential
human rights were flawed.

But they paid their taxes and voted to spent their money to build a
working democracy.

They had vision and hope.

Hope and a working democracy gave birth to the civil rights Movement, to
the gay rights movement, to feminism and the mid 20th Century explosion of art and ideas that lead to the internet and social media.

What is a working democracy?

A working Democracy is one in which we as a Nation talk to each other and use reason; it is one in which the people and their leaders live by and respect the rule of law.

A working democracy is one in which we have faith in our ability to make
the right choices and faith in our ability to eventually do what is just, what
is right and what is good, regardless of the cost.

Good and evil are the choices we make as a people.

Will we allow a corrupt tyrant to usurp our government and our
freedoms  or will we demand the removal of his puppet and those
who work to protect him.

The choice is ours

(c) Rob Goldstein 2014-2017 All Rights Reserved

 
First written and posted in 2014 as ‘Broken’.

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